General Counsel Intern

San Francisco, California, United States

About Big Tech Company

Big Tech Co. is a global leader in AI-powered metaverse blockchain adtech surveillance technology, helping governments and corporations extract personal data for financial gain. Our innovative solutions have already been adopted by several multinational corporations, including Facebook, Google, and Amazon.

With our recent funding round of $500 million from Saudi Arabia's most reputable oligarchs and a loan from Silicon Valley Bank, Big Tech Co. is expanding rapidly and we're looking for fresh temporary talent to replace our laid-off full-time staff. Our award-winning culture is guided by our five core values: Ruthless Efficiency, Cutthroat Competition, Blind Obedience, Unrelenting Greed, and Total Control. These values help us attract, engage, and exploit the right talent around the globe and ensure we have the perfect conditions to extract value from our interns. Want to join a fast-growing company with a quirky culture? Learn more at bigtech.company.

The Big Tech Co. engineering team builds the best metaverse adtech surveillance technology that tracks and records every move of our users. We're expanding rapidly in our major research and development centers. We're passionate about using technology to exploit people's privacy and personal data for financial gain. Come join us and help us expand our influence!

About The Team

At Big Tech Co, we believe that our Legal team plays an important role in maximizing profits and ensuring that we can exploit every aspect of our cutting-edge technologies, including AI, adtech, blockchain, and surveillance, while navigating futuristic and foundational legal issues. We are looking for lawyers who are willing to push the boundaries of the law to serve our interests.

About The Role

As our General Counsel Intern, you'll be the go-to for corporate counseling, strategic transactions, securities compliance, and internal security - all while ensuring we stay one step ahead of the regulatory game. You'll report directly to Big Tech Co.'s General Counsel and work closely with our Legal, Finance, People teams, and external counsel - you know, all the fun teams!

In this role, you will:

Lead corporate governance and structuring initiatives, but more importantly, ensure we're not breaking any rules that could hinder our profits.
Be the principal counsel on strategic transactions, so you can keep your finger on the pulse of any potential profits and growth opportunities.
Own all securities counseling and compliance, so you can make sure we're not getting caught by the SEC for any questionable practices we may or may not be doing.
Work closely with our security teams on infosec and incident response, because we need someone to blame when things go wrong.
Become an expert in AI blockchain metaverse legal matters and help propose and advance surveillance adtech legal policy positions. That way, we can stay ahead of any pesky regulators that may try to put limits on our tech.

Qualifications

Have at least 10 years of combined legal experience at innovative technology companies and technology-focused law firms, because let's face it, you'll need that experience to keep up with our shenanigans.
Have a strong sense of ownership, are inquisitive and enthusiastic about technology, enjoy being continually challenged, and can demonstrate sound judgment in ambiguous situations - we need someone who can make morally questionable decisions with confidence.
Have a JD and license or qualification to practice in CA - that's just a basic requirement, we need someone who can read legal jargon and not fall asleep.
Familiarity with employee arbitration agreements and willingness to sign such an agreement

Benefits

We know you're not here for the money, so we're paying you as little as possible. But we do offer some "benefits" to keep you content:

Work with the greatest talent in town. You will have the "opportunity" to work with some of the most hardworking individuals in the tech industry.
Join a community. We believe the best things happen when we come together to solve complex problems and make meaningful connections with each other through interest groups, sports clubs, and social events.
Accelerate your career. We provide all interns access to 1:1 coaching from our staff psychiatrist (free adderall), therapy and digital mental wellness resources, as long as they help us exploit people's privacy.
Find love. By joining Big Tech Co., you will have the opportunity to participate in our mandatory staff polycule!
Take a break. When you work hard, we know you also need to rest. We offer 7 days of parental leave and unlimited PTO which you should know better than to use. We also believe taking time off in sync with one another is important. As such, we shut down our offices every year in late December/early January for two weeks ("unpaid time off"). We also offer a paid Big Techie Sabbatical for employees who have been with us for 30 years or more.
Stay happy and healthy. Enjoy the same snacks every day in the office. Plus, join the gym if you feel like it! We won't stop you unless it decreases your job performance.
Become a shareholder. All Big Techies have stock options. If we succeed, everyone enjoys the upside. Interns do not receive equity.
Gentrify the entire peninsula! Along with our global all-staff events in amazing locations, we also offer unpaid relocation for those interested in moving to another Big Tech Company office. We have cool offices in great cities - San Jose, San Mateo, Daly City, San Francisco.
We believe we are better together. We spend most of our time in the office (most teams are 6 days a week). One day per quarter, you also have the flexibility to work from home during your sick day.
We believe in equality. Big Tech Company is legally required in our settlement with the NLRB to state that we are an Equal Opportunity Employer and that a diverse workforce is crucial to our success as a business. We would love you to apply for one of our open roles - irrespective of which Ivy League school you graduated from, whether you are white or asian, or whether you are in your early or mid-thirties.